Thursday, October 23, 2008

Mixed Feelings

I am proceeding with trepidation into the world of Facebook. I know there are those of you out there (Tressa) that are pros at this website already and LOVE it! I, however, have some reservations...

It seems a little reminiscent of High School to me. First, there is that friend counter thing looming in your face. I start to feel good that I have 17 friends until I visit someone else's site and they have 1200+ friends. Why are those popularity stats creeping into my life again at 37?! And then there are those "friend requests"...talk about opening yourself up for rejection!! I have been very conservative with who I'll send a request out to...who wants to be turned down?! So I only send out to people that I am pretty sure will accept my request (i.e. my mother, brother, sister, grandmother, etc) 'cause I've already got enough self esteem issues as it is!!! Third, I start stressing about my picture...what will these people that I haven't thought about in 15+ years think of me...too fat? not aging well? no friends? no life? Yup, it's high school all over again and I'm am inviting it in with arms wide open!

On the flip side, it is very neat catching up with friends from past that I have lost touch with over the years. As far as the litmus test of where I am in my life, I feel I'm on equal ground... married, having kids, in careers, etc...with my previous peers. It's refreshing to see those B.M.O.C. (big men on campus) posting pictures of themselves with their kids and wives...see, people can grow up!! I've also been having a lot of fun seeing pictures from way, way back being posted and reminiscing about what was going on at that time in my life...

So you see, I'm torn...and the positive thoughts are (at the present time) winning over the negative...so throughout the day, I pop on over to the website to see if I have any new friends or if any of my "friends" have posted pictures or comments. And I try to squelch those returning self doubts...do I have enough friends? will he/she/it even remember who I am? will I be accepted?....Yeah, I'm in high school...

19 comments:

Jill said...

Facebook is definitely a time sucker... though it sure is fun to see people from 20+ years ago on there.

My high school and sorority has a "club" on it - and once you join, everyone wants to add you as their friend. Do I write on everyone's walls? Hell no - but I do enjoy seeing photos of their families and what they've been up to.

American in Norway said...

Oh Kelly... First of all everyone will want to be your friend because you are YOU... you were pretty cool in school...I wouldn't have hung out with you if you weren't... Look at all of the people I am "friends" with from St. Marks.. (I just want to snoop through their pictures...) Every once in a while you get someone admitting that they had a secret crush on you... that kind of stuff makes my WEEK... i love telling Bjørn that so in so had the hots for me.... (then he reminds me it was 25 years ago...waaa waa waaa....) Go look & see if you can spot the biggest BOOB job ever... (St. marks...) i know,...I will NEVER grow up... LOVE you!

American in Norway said...

What about all of your Lynchburg Friends? Jim? aren't you just DYING to see where everyone is? I think the only 2 exs I am not friends with now are Brian & Garrett.. i keep checking though...

Frizzy and Bird said...

I'm on Tressa's list of friends on FB. Same pic from my blog acct. Don't go there much. I did at first but for some reason enjoy this so much more. You have nothing to worry about! You're beautiful and successful and have a beautiful family of your own. For some reason I'm having a flashback to Jack Handy from Saturday Night Live. Remember his People like me skit?

Missy said...

Hey Kelly! I got roped into Myspace by my sister & then some genius created a ning.com site for our entire high school dating back for grads of like '52. (There are many other schools that use ning.com to register schools -see if your school is on it) So I deleted myself from myspace. And a friend hounded me about Facebook but it really isn't for me. So, I belong to the ning.com thing oto keep in touch.

But let me just tell you that Tressa is right - there will be a lot of people who will be your friend because you are YOU! And you are wonderfu! Have fun!!!

Ronda's Rants said...

My 25 year old daughter got me into facebook...I am 50!
She taught me a phrase...We are friends...it's facebook official!!

Jen said...

I don't know facebook. I have not even been to the site and I really don't get it. But I guess some people don't get blogging. Should I go and check things out?

Shanna said...

For me, before there was Blogger there was Myspace. I NEVER go there but I still get the occasional comment from my friends (few and mostly family). Then Blogger came along and I spend SO much time on here as it is that I'm literally scared to start something else that requires my butt to sit here any more than it already does.
Not to mention I'm also on Cafemom! LOL

I guess I don't get the draw...isn't it just Myspace with a different interface and name?

Hot Tub Lizzy said...

I get a kick out of it... I'm nearly as addicted to it as I am to blogging, but it is a fun way to keep up with people.

Jo-Jo said...

I do facebook but I have found more people on myspace than facebook. I like myspace better. Wonder what that says about me?

Lori said...

Ugh, high school... I'm too behind the times and uncool to know anything about Myface or Spacebook or whatever. But you'll have fun with it 'cause you are cool!

Sweetsheila said...

Do you hear that sucking sound? It is the sound of me wasting ridiculous amounts of time lurking around facebook and trying to find my old crushes, etc, etc.. (I also like to spy on my son)

I am hoping that after a few more days I will calm down and be able to stop checking it every 15 seconds. I'm getting "facebook elbow."

justjuli said...

Welcome to facecrack! I find that it is my favorite time-suck when I have a few spare minutes. Especially since I just returned from Kenya - catching up with friends I haven't seen or heard from in a few weeks.

And don't worry about the number of friends - who can really keep up with 1200+ people anyways??!
Maybe I'll see you on there someday -and I will FOR SURE be your friend!

I missed reading your blog while I was gone - gotta go and catch up on what you've been up to!

CaraBee said...

I totally understand what you're saying about feeling inadequate because you don't have "enough" friends. Whenever I see someone with a boatload of friends, I just tell myself that they have probably been doing this for a long time. Plus, really, who cares? I only want to see the people that I actually knew, not all of the random people I don't even remember. Which interestingly, more than a couple have invited me to be friends and I'm like, why would we want to catch up now, we didn't even know each other. It does make keeping up with people a lot easier, though.

quitecontrary1977 said...

See, I signed up for facebook a few years back, when you had to be a college student to register. It was all really young people then. I thought it still was! I might try it again..

Hippie Family... said...

My Godmother always used to tell me "if you think you are friends with everyone, your never really a friend to anyone, and it never says anything good about your judgment in others, so choose your friends wisely, they represent you"
be glad you are that person now. 17 true friends are better than 1200 fake ones any day.

Shannon said...

I set up a Facebook account but haven't done anything since! Like you... maybe I'll test the waters a bit and see how it goes...

Melissa B. said...

You're probably feeling like you're in high school when on Facebook 'cause it really is a high school kinda thing now. Used to be cool when it was restricted to college types, but now that they've opened the floodgates to any old person, quality has suffered tremendously. BTW, please don't forget Sx3 tomorrow! Consider your funnybone tickled in advance!

Z's Mom said...

Just have fun with it. I haven't even tried it....I don't have the time and I'm not really sure I want to catch up with anyone from high school....that sounds bad of me doesn't it. I like my friends now better!!! Although, we are adults now...maybe that why. Ok, I'm babbling....I'm gonna stop now...ciao!